Balance

Big changes coming this semester, and I'm not one who handles change very well.

This whirlwind year of marriage and teaching has been a Frankenstein style mashup of all my jobs I had before marriage, plus taking care of a new puppy, a house, moving an hour in traffic away from my old job, and teaching at the gym.  Basically, I realized in 2017 that I'm superwoman and that I can do way more than I thought.

But that doesn't mean I should do more than I thought, as evidenced my the effects of stress on my body.  I am a very energetic person, but I need downtime like no ones's business because at the heart of all my personality, I am an introvert.  I need to sit in silence, without stimulation.  It is so hard for me to not be Super Housewife™ when I am finally home after teaching all day, driving in traffic, picking up dinner to make.  I find it hard to sit down.  There is always more to be done, and I end up exhausting myself and running on adrenaline to my detriment. 

I am trying to have a baby, here!  I went and saw the doctor and he suggested that stress could be making it harder for me to get pregnant and that cutting down my stress would help in so many ways.  I am taking this to heart.  Not only for future possible (hopeful) baby, but for me and my sweet husband.  I don't need to go ballistic all the time.  I need some balance.

So, I'm cutting back on my long drive days, and spreading out my high school students to two days.  I'm also picking up some 5th and 6th graders to fill out the hours between high school lessons.  On paper this looks a lot more easy going, but we'll see.  I'm notorious for taking on too much.

I do fantasize about being a housewife.  Women's lib ruined the workforce for men, flooded it with too many workers, and now we have an economy based on a two person income.  I hate that.  But these past few days at home, I've been depressed.  I know I'd go crazy without some project to work on, or a little fire under me to get me going toward the next thing.

So, do pray for me if you would.  I'm trying so hard to be a woman of God and not over do it, or be lazy.  Balance has always been hard for me.